‘Bad Blood’ and A Heart for Restoration

A couple of weeks ago I was taking inventory of a pile of stuff we’re getting rid of at work, and to keep myself sane while cataloging, I was rocking out to the Taylor Swift station on Pandora.  (Why? Because I love Taylor Swift.  She has a song for absolutely everything.) Anyway, one of the songs from her newest album, 1989, came on: Bad Blood.

The opening lines and chorus go like this:

‘Cause, baby, now we got bad blood
You know it used to be mad love
So take a look what you’ve done
‘Cause, baby, now we got bad blood
Now we got problems
And I don’t think we can solve them
You made a really deep cut
And, baby, now we got bad blood

I. Fell. In. Love.  Had-to-hear-it-again-immediately kind of love.  There isn’t a music video (yet), so I went to iTunes, shelled out a-buck-twenty-nine, and have listened to it and sung it out at the top of my lungs many times over since that day.

I get this song.

In the middle of one of my (many) listens, I was convicted because the message of this song is at times the anthem of my heart (even before it was written, probably).  Someone hurts me, sometimes in an already wounded place, and I distance myself so as not to give that person that opportunity again.  Even if I don’t write about it, or say anything at all, my attitude and actions will say, This. Can’t. Be. Fixed.  Just like Taylor Swift’s Bad Blood.

And that’s a problem.

You see, recently God has been teaching me about restoration – both His heart for restoration, and how He wants me to have a heart for restoration.  I petition God on a daily basis for restoration, telling Him it’s what I want.

But is it?

Is it really?

Because what is restoration but to fix something? To return it to its intended condition and purpose?

Is my heart for bad blood, or is it for restoration?

There isn’t room for both.

I choose restoration.

And I’m giving my heart a new anthem:  Worn, by Tenth Avenue North.

Let me see redemption win
Let me know the struggle ends
That you can mend a heart
That’s frail and torn
I wanna know a song can rise
From the ashes of a broken life
And all that’s dead inside can be reborn
Cause all that’s dead inside will be reborn
Though I’m worn

Heavenly Father, give me a heart – Your heart – for restoration!